SELFISHNESS comes from the word selfish - concerned with your own interests, needs, and wishes while ignoring those of others.
MARTYR - somebody who experiences frequent or constant pain from something
These two has to be apart. Live their lives separately. To stop hurting each other's feeling. So if there's still little of this left:
LOVE - transitive and intrnsitive verb to feel romantic and longing for somebody
they could still save of what they have...
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